I have to do something different, or I'm going to die.

Do you have any idea how horrifying it is for me to type that title, knowing that it could be true? I have not ate, at all, today. And when I don't eat, I don't normally take my meds. I am so effed up by Jessi leaving me. I should be okay with it, she's really screwed me over in the past, and again now. She lies as smoothly as if it were Gospel dropping from her lips. She deliberately deceived me about the car, and has hidden it ever since. But, the sad fact is, that I actually love the woman. And it's killing me, literally and figuratively. I have got to figure out what I'm going to do to get past this. She tells me there's a chance for us, after she gets her precious divorce. So, that's that. Only "a chance" or "I'm not making any promises", which both mean no, I just don't want to argue right now.